When I want to discover what’s happening in the world, I go on X (formerly Twitter) to see what ‘Black Twitter’ says. My search was stopped when I saw Esperanza Spalding was trending. If you are unfamiliar with Esperanza Spalding, she is a remarkably talented young jazz musician. As most assume when someone is trending, something is wrong. As I scrolled through my timeline, it wasn’t that something was wrong with her, it was a barrage of responses to the lyrics of Drake’s new song that mentioned her.
In his lyrics, he attacks her for winning a Grammy over a decade ago for which they were both nominated. He brags, pointing out that he now has four Grammys, and mocks her by saying “then we never hear from you again like you were taken.” He also says: “Who gives a — Michelle Obama put you on her playlist?” I was not only baffled about the attack on Esperanza but adding a slight to the former First Lady of the United States was so disrespectful.
Sadly, Drake failed to research that Spalding has taught at Berklee starting at the age of 20, taught at Harvard until 2022, and has continued to create music. Like many, Drake obviously believes that success is tied to one’s financial success instead of other important traits such as kindness, compassion, philanthropy, character, and honor. As much as people would like to say this is a part of ‘dissing’ others in hip-hop, it’s moved from attacking male peers to assaultive lyrics targeting Black women, even some who are not even in the genre or in music.
For Aubrey Graham (his real name), this isn’t new. His lyrics have been laced with vitriol both in the past and present. But he’s not the only one. Disrespect does not discriminate. I’ve witnessed women assassinate men. Adults humiliate children. Children insult adults. We see those in political power undermine and belittle those they are to work with in order to govern our country. If we examine much of popular culture, we are witnessing the increasing demise of respect and honor. This behavior is so accepted that people laugh at it or defend it. Honor and Respect begin in our homes.
This is a commandment from God, and it is not just for the children. Parents have a responsibility in the way they treat their children. “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right”; “Honor your father and mother” (which is the first commandment with a promise) “so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth; “Parents do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord,” Ephesians 6:1-4.
Respect requires us to be kind, courteous, polite, thoughtful, and understanding. “Show proper respect to everyone, love the family of believers, fear God, honor the emperor,” 1 Peter 2:17. The Bible gives clear instructions on what is to be honored: preachers and teachers of the faith (1 Timothy 5:17); governing authorities (Romans 13:1-7); marriage (Hebrews 13:4); the Son and the Father (John 5:22- 23); our bodies (1 Thessalonians 4:4 and 1 Corinthians 6:20); and our money and resources (Proverbs 3:9).
There are promises that are fulfilled in our lives when we pursue honor and respect. To honor God and others requires a level of humility and there are blessings as a result.
- “Whoever pursues righteousness and love finds life, prosperity, and honor,” Proverbs 21:21.
- “Humility is the fear of the Lord; its wages are riches and honor and life,” Proverbs 22:4.
- “Whoever oppresses the poor shows contempt for their Maker, but whoever is kind to the needy honors God,” Proverbs 14:31.
No matter how disrespectful the world may be, you were created to be different. “Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven,” Matthew 5:16. Every day, you have opportunities to shine, to show honor and respect starting with those around you.
(Dr. Froswa’ Booker-Drew is the host of the Tapestry podcast and the author of three books for women. She is also the vice president of Community Affairs for the State Fair of Texas. To learn more, visit <drfroswa.com>.)
